Charlotticus

This performance/installation came about because of a man, who is lacking in the necessary skills involving boundaries, decided to tell me that I would “be bikini-ready if I just lost ten pounds.” Upon serving him his second beer, he gave a more descriptive analysis of the pitfalls of my body. In order to cleanse myself of this experience, I decided to do an installation in which I meticulously chronicled his words, as well as other voicing’s I have encountered in regards to my body (both good and bad).

I wanted to put myself on display, similar to an insect pinned to a wall. In using this scientific format, I was hoping to take an ironic approach in illustrating how I have retained a number of subjective comments as beacons of truth in my life. Being behind glass in that confined corner further added to the scrutiny I have felt from others in the past. The pins, though a little disturbing, emphasized how I have become emotionally scarred from a number of these interactions.

If I were to do the piece again, I would consider being nude, although I feel that it may disrupt the theme of universality that is very important in my works (even though they are always very personal). If I were to be nude, I would change the site to more of a lab-like setting with bright fluorescent lights, and make the scenery more important to the piece. It would probably become something entirely different.

Doing performances such as this, even with my minimal actions, is really very terrifying for me. I’m not sure if I want to explore that idea or not. I much appreciated the classes support and comments. The piece was maybe too personal for my level of comfort, but it showed that exploring these ideas in a classroom setting can be very helpful and safer than I may have imagined.